distance, literal thousands of miles of space between us, makes things clearer. for what seems like years and at times only days, i've been restructuring and rehashing the part of the universe that seems out of line with my personal view of it. the ins and outs of the whole world swam around my head and i could only see one thing at a time. but sitting under a mosquito net just about as far away as i could possibly be, my world was laid out like big puzzle pieces in front of me. i moved a few things around and could see the whole picture at the same time and fit it all together, and then i put it in my pocket safe and went about my life. i felt stronger. bigger. better. i wasn't afraid anymore, wasn't insecure or confused or hurt. it all fit together and it was compact enough to deal with at once. but a short bus ride later into the city and the noises began again. and all of a sudden i lost track of that feeling and everything started spinning again. i think it might be slower now, or smaller, but i can't put it in my bag anymore. i'm tired already.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
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